Day 82: Nice?
North America, people often are nice. Niceness is how they relate to one another. It is the reason I never quite fit in. It's not that I'm not nice, but that I am not nice. There is a difference, of course. In my day-to-day interactions with humans, it is not my main directive to just be nice. Polite is enough for social situations.
Today I was made to think about this when one of my colleagues, who is more junior but in a clear position of power in reference to me, derided my work, told me how I must change it, and declared that, if I ever presented her with that, she would leave the room and not come back. I should clarify that she has a point. We were discussing a very sensitive issue that could have a profound effect on the lived experiences of vulnerable people. Her objections are both valid and noted. I wish I could say that she also noted the fact that I have been given a great deal of thought to this matter and that I was aware of the potential issues before they were pointed out to me. She couldn't have known (because I have not told this to anyone) how much I have agonized about the inclusion of those matters and how personally affect me. But I digress...
What I cannot understand is what I perceive as an underlying hostility towards me from this colleague. I have been reflecting on this and I wonder whether this might be a cultural issue. I have not been nice to her in the way she expects others to be. This is not because I don't want to be, but because I express myself differently.
My main directive is not niceness, but helpfulness. It has always been like that.
Canada cases 95,947
World cases 6,734,591
World deaths 394,887
World recoveries 2,746,332 (lower than yesterday. Was there a mistake?)